Eat her!
"I should be the one apologizing- I wish i could give you
something, but I have no food. Accept my humblest apologies." she
said, sounding very sorry.
"Oh, it's all right- as long as I have you." You respond.
"Are- Are you hitting on me?" The elf asks, a mixture of
embarassment and anger on her face.
"No, I'm about to eat you," you retort, licking you lips.
"What? I don't underst-" the elf tries to say, but before
she can complete a sentence, you tackle her to the ground. You rip off
all her jewelry - they're undigestable, and possibly valuable, too-
and begin your meal.
You open your mouth to the extent of being about 3X larger than a
regular human mouth, and, from the feet up, slowly rap your maw around
your screaming, writhing prey.
"How-Why are you doing this? I don't understand- Let go of
me!" The elf cries, as her midsection disappears into your gaping
mouth. Once you reach her neck, she starts screaming maniacally.
It almost scared you for a second-the way she screamed, but it was
over, as a second later- her head, along with her entire body- were in
your stomach.
Now what? It could take up to 2 months for a snake to digest a meal,
you've heard. The elven girl was already banging at your stomach,
crying for help.
It was going to be a fun 2 months, you could
tell.
"Sorry, I guess I haven't eaten in a while" you say, trying
to sound apologetic.
